We have seen what the traction league has come to. We watched the battle for survival and the losses suffered by those who chose to simply fortify the mountain in place. We have combined the great engines and the mountain. We shall be safe in our fortress. We shall rule the sky.
We must haunt him.
Wake him. How can we haunt him if he will not awaken to see us? Touch him.
We cannot. There is a barrier.
Shake him. Move the barrier. Quickly, our time is short.
We cannot. The barrier defies us. He sleeps the sleep of the exhausted. He will not acknowledge us.
Perhaps he is shaken already. Perhaps his struggles outweigh us. We must move on.
We move on.
It’s a simple word. An easy concept. The act of keeping something within limits. The process of preventing the expansion of a hostile power. Light knows that Darkness needs to be held in check. It’s not a new idea. It’s been practiced and attempted for longer than people know. Those who don’t study history and all that.
Darkness feels Light straining to enter unwanted places. Corners exposed, shadows shifted and a new vision of place and purpose. Darkness slips away and fades as light expands, but then creeps around and steals back into unwatched rooms and back alleys. Shadows always slide in unnoticed.
Sometimes it’s not so easy. Sometimes the darkness pushes limits. Puts a strain on boundaries, forces the pressure to build. Light pushes back. These forces battle unseen. The fight rages in secret back rooms, penthouse suites, shopping mall corridors and occasionally in hotel basements. Daunting, dangerous and fiercely contested these battle rage with the only true victory being the safety of those who don’t know.
That is our place. That is our purpose. The cleaners.
Light and Dark may rage and storm. Battles may be won or lost. Our only mandate is secrecy. Patching the walls to replace the char of a light blast. Repainting the ceiling to remove the stains of dampness. Unwinding the stray threads shimmering in a curtain, trying to dampen the effectiveness of a simple defense for Darkness. Sometimes mopping up liquified darkness and replacing carpet…
I know that being a pro in the field of writing – any writing – requires the ability to write on demand. Deadlines must be met. Words must be produced. Nobody will pay you for the fanciful ideas floating in your head until you write them down (or draw them, or paint them, or build them). Waiting for inspiration is the direct path to never selling anything. Writing takes practice. It means repetition and expansion and edits among many other things.
I often quote a very famous author who has a slick statement about inspiration. “I don’t have a muse, I have a mortgage…” is a great quote. It’s easy to say. It’s hard to back that up.
I am far more attached to my mood than is good for anyone who wishes to be successful as a creative artist of any kind. The combination of creative drain from my day job, my inability to focus on a single kind of creativity and the things that happen in my day to day life often mean I am drained and just have no creative juice left to flow when I get to the keys.
I want to include some kind of declaration here about how I intend to do more, be better or whatever would fit, but the truth is that mood matters. I have made many declarations like this in the past and none of them have ever pushed me past certain barriers. Schedules, task lists, extensive notes are all wonderful and helpful things but none of those produce inspiration. There’s no spark. I’m going to keep struggling along in the best way I can. I’ll keep looking for that moment when a story leaps fully formed from my head, into my fingers and directly through the keys. Mood matters.
What inspires you?
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Transfiguration (2020) from Universal Everything on Vimeo.
He would not stop.
Most thought it was rage. Some thought it was pure spite and malice.
He was coming. He would not stop.
They tried the physical to no avail. They called in all the wizards they could find. They cast, the chanted, they threw magic. There was fire. There was acid, there was stone. There was anything and everything until pure chaos was the result.
He would not stop.
They cajoled, they pleaded. They wailed and moaned.
He would not stop. He could not stop. It was not rage or spite or malice at all. It was love and it drove him onward.
Yes, It’s later than everyone else but I am finally acknowledging the new year. The end of 2018 was a busy time for me. It was a time for the holidays and family but also when I started to come back from a massive slump. 2018 was a miserable year for me creatively. I read next to nothing, I wrote next to nothing and I did a handful of art pieces that I don’t like much. Terrible. There were a lot of things to be thankful for over the year, but it was still a tough year. It’s easy to put a marker at the change of a calendar year and claim “new” but I had already started all that back before Christmas – now I just need to keep it rolling.
For anyone keeping track I haven’t changed my personal view on resolutions. Many years ago I made a New Year’s resolution to NEVER make a New Year’s resolution again. Guess what? Nailed it again. Still going strong on that one. IF you want or need change in your life, the calendar is convenient, but not required. Make the change to grow or get better when you make that choice. You can do it!
I’m going to apply some of that same enthusiasm to my own work. I’m still struggling along, but I’ll get there. So will you. Have a fantastic 2019 – I look forward to a lot of wonderful stuff.
One of the panels I was on at Philcon was titled “A Creative Apocalypse” and the description was, “What creative and original – but scientifically plausible – ways are left for storytellers to destroy the world?”
I kind of struggled with this question initially. Creative I can handle, it’s the scientifically plausible that I was worried about. Part of me really wanted to separate out destruction of all human life from actual destruction of the planet, but that line of discussion didn’t get far. Not much of a story without the people (still horribly narcissistic if you ask me).
Then I seemed to recall something about massive ant colonies that spanned across vast distances. I didn’t have a chance to do any research on it, but it was in the back of my mind that I had seen this so I presented it (when I could) at the panel. I find a plague of bugs to be a less than ideal concept for the end of the world (YUCK!).
I took a moment to see if I could find the information I remembered and found this fun little piece about floating colonies of fire ants in Texas.
Smacking into one of those would certainly ruin your day, but it wasn’t what I remembered. Hunting a little more brought me to the mega-colony. Yes, it was a huge colony and it actually reaches far further than I seemed to recall. Crossing continents. Almost all of them, and they don’t’ seem to fight each other. This could be very bad news for people should these bugs ever band together.
A sharp-eyed friend of mine then pointed me to a whole different point of view. What if all the bugs GO AWAY?
Turns out we need them. We need as many variations and weird combinations as we can keep. We need to learn as much as we can to preserve ourselves. The bug-pocalypse could just be that we don’t have any. A distressing thought indeed. Now to turn that into a world ending story…
Showing up. This is a topic that I’ve wanted to take on for quite a while now. I went to a meeting that wasn’t a couple of weeks back. I was more than a little put out at the idea that a meeting (associated with a professional trade organization) would be advertised and then nobody would show up. It reminded me of a news article I saw back during the winter Olympics. The article (here) was about an Olympic skier who apparently is not very good. She is world ranked simply because she keeps showing up – particularly when others can’t. The question in my mind becomes, is showing up enough? I’ve been rolling this around in my head for a while now and I’m still not sure I have a good answer.
To some degree showing up is the only thing that matters.
Showing up, and showing up consistently is the one thing that I’m actually quite good at. It’s something that I think is a virtue or a value and it was clearly and stated or installed I’m not sure exactly how you phrase that, by my parents. It has been a really long time since I was in high school but even then showing up, and showing up on time, was a thing that I was very good at. I actually had perfect attendance all four years in high school. Perfect attendance meant never missed a day (unscheduled – I wasn’t in class one time while I was off looking at a college) and never late. I don’t remember how many people did that in my class, but I don’t think it was many. I don’t know if I got anything from that perfect attendance. I don’t know if that’s exactly the right way to phrase that, because I did get something, I got a pin (I actually I think I also got a piece of paper or some kind of award too) but beyond that I don’t think I got anything. The part I question about this now becomes, is there something to regret? I know other people who took days and very specifically did not show up. Some of those days were apparently the Grand Adventure or the wild story that formed a significant part of their youth. I’m not sure, and never will be, that I didn’t miss something that I could have been out doing.
Grade school is a different topic. There clearly is value to showing up, if not every single day, at least consistently. Not being there will actually cause you to miss out on things you’re supposed to learn. Beyond the simple fact that you would miss things, there are actual legal requirements for kids to attend. I don’t know what the exact requirements are, but I believe there is a limit of either 4 or 6 days that kids are allowed to miss during the school year before there becomes an issue. Clear value and legal requirement.
Moving forward. College does not have the attendance requirement that public school has. I have always understood that showing up for class in college was meant to be an exercise and self-discipline as much as it was for learning whatever the topic was you were supposed to be studying. No college that I had heard of before had placed specific attendance requirements on their classes. This might be something that’s changing. I have recently heard of specific classes instituting attendance requirements in order to receive passing grades. A portion of this stems from the fact that an online presence and virtual classes now allow students who are ambitious enough to cover the topics that would normally be talked about in class on the internet without any interaction with other people. In the past as long as you turned in your homework assignments and sat for your exams those were the pieces that made up your grade. There were certainly classes when I was in college that attendance wasn’t mandatory but made a significant difference in my understanding of what the concept was we were supposed to be covering or learning about. I think that attendance or showing up certainly has value in being able to discuss ideas with others around you and garner some extra level of understanding about topics while giving you viewpoints that may differ significantly from your own.
College, showing up may not be mandatory but clearly is advantageous.
As an adult showing up is something that becomes more difficult to quantify. Any number of day to day, normal 9 to 5 jobs have very specific requirements about showing up. You must be there, you must be there on time, you cannot leave early, and there are a very limited number of days when you are allowed to not be there and even then must have an excuse. That is not to say that there are aren’t jobs available that allow you to set your own schedule. I think schedule is a completely separate question from attendance. There’s a subtle difference attendance and showing up. There are a lot of jobs out there that allow you to work on something other than a normal 9 to 5 schedule. Those jobs while not requiring specific attendance certainly require dedication and work. Essentially you have to ‘show up’ at some point and apply yourself to whatever work it is that you’re doing. The more you do that with a non-traditional job the higher the likelihood that you will be successful. Clearly attendance and the intent behind my phrase ‘showing up’ are two separate issues. Perhaps I need to define what I mean by ‘showing up’. Narrowing that down will help me understand better.
I think it’s relevant to look back at the skier example at this point. She has a world ranking. It’s her job, but also her passion (I suspect). Many people don’t think she’s a good skier at all, let alone world ranked. How can you be bad at your job but still ranked as one of the best in the world? The shortest answer here is there aren’t enough people doing what it is that you do. In this girl’s case I think it’s more subtle than that, and also more important to the chosen field of endeavor than that. No, she might not be great at what she does, but she is consistently there and consistently promoting something that she wants to see succeed. I think that’s the heart of what I mean by showing up. If you want something to succeed, you have to keep showing up. Having the idea, having a desire for something to succeed is not enough. At some point somebody has to keep showing up and doing the work. I suspect that this sport will benefit in the long run from this person continuing to show up. I know in certain professional organizations that I am part of showing up is something that has mattered a great deal and continues to matter a great deal. Membership in our professional group is declining at a significant rate. Good, bad, indifferent, doesn’t really matter if nobody’s there to see what you’re doing. What you do or promote doesn’t matter if you don’t have enough people to have a meeting. All of the benefits that go along with this group simply go away if not enough people keep showing up.
I think I’ve talked myself into the understanding that I’m trying to achieve. Attendance is different than showing up. Showing up and doing the work matters. It will continue to matter because in order for there to be greatness there has to be something available to be great at. Whether or not I will actually be great at anything can be less relevant then continuing to show up so that there is something for others to be great at.
Consistency matters. now that I’ve talked about it I recall that I have written about consistency before. I’ll need to go and dig out this old article that I had written and post it again.
Will the name of this skier be remembered in history? Maybe not. Will that matter to people in the future? It will only matter if the thing that she is promoting continues on and become something greater than what she’s a part of now. Will being remembered to history matter to her? I can’t really say as I’m not in her head. Something I can say with certainty is that consistently showing up and getting out the door and doing things absolutely matters. Showing up makes all the difference in the story of what it is that you do. In the end it will make a difference that you have a collection of fantastic stories that accumulate to make your life. Make your story a great one. Get out there and show up to something.
It’s actually a little difficult to believe that 2018 is upon us. The past year has certainly gone faster than I would have imagined – and not nearly as cleanly. There are lots of reasons that 2017 wasn’t fantastic – but there were certainly a lot of good things for me personally and that’s the level I really have to work at here.
For anyone keeping track I haven’t changed my personal view on resolutions. Many years ago I made a New Year’s resolution to NEVER make a New Year’s resolution again. Guess what? Totally nailed it. Still going strong on that one. IF you want or need change in your life, the calendar is convenient, but not required. Make the change to grow or get better when you make that choice. You can do it!
That being said I do intend to keep forging ahead with my personal projects this year. I’ve still got about 9 things going at any one time. I’m still being a fan, an author and an artist. I game, I work at the day job and I spend time with my awesome family.
I genuinely hope that you and yours have an excellent year – positive feelings and good things should come your way!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!