Longer than I thought

Posted on January 1, 2016 by Eric

I’ve seen a of folks out there posting about the new year. A number of them spent time talking about how much 2015 wasn’t great (some I know personally and they’ve got reasons I agree with). A lot of folks were all about goal setting and calendar year based stuff (that I’ve posted about before). Some folks looked back and discussed anniversaries of things.

It struck me that I didn’t know how long I’ve been writing The Pretend Blog. It’s not something I ever expected to go anywhere or mean anything to folks other than me (and maybe my wife) so I never tracked it.

As it turns out I started right about this time of year (my first two posts being December 28 and January 7) back in 2008. That means I’ve been at it for 8 years. That’s actually a shocking number to me. I didn’t realize I’d been at it that long. The funniest part? I may have grown and changed in some ways, but a number of things really haven’t changed at all. Blimps are still pretty pimp, and the ultimate showdown still amuses me to no end.

Here’s what I posted 8 years ago:

The Pretend Blog. Being the anal-retentive (with a hyphen, not a colon – thank you John) type that I am, I naturally didn’t want to jump into this until I had a better handle on what I would be doing and where it would all be going and what the potential legal ramifications would be etc., etc.. In November of 2006 I started a Word document and called it The Pretend Blog. It was my way of actually writing stuff down and ‘getting started’ rather than just jumping in cold and trying stuff out.

More than a year later – here it is. I kept the name and put it out there. There are maybe three people that actually care about this other than me. It seems a little pretentious to think that there will ever be a day when a whole crowd of people will be interested in what I might have to say here.

I went back and looked at the rambling stuff I wrote over the past year (about a page worth or more per month). Most of it is annoying and angst ridden – so I chucked it. This journal is my stream of consciousness stuff that’s for me. I’ll probably post a bunch of stuff I like and not worry about all the other pretentious, whiny stuff that worried me before. Besides, how else would I get these things stuck in other peoples’ heads?

Blimps are pretty pimp

Ultimate Showdown Good guys, bad guys and explosions. Thank you Lemon Demon.

Good guys, bad guys and explosions!

Happy New What?

Posted on January 1, 2016 by Eric

Consistency matters – and not just when you’re cooking. It’s actually something I tend to be good at. I am consistent. I suspect that will make some folks think this “new” New Year’s post is somehow cheating, but it’s not. It’s consistent. That’s the sort of thing that make a resolution something more, makes it a real change. Another year down, another year sticking to a resolution I made many years ago…

Resolutions Past

Latin Distraction

Posted on December 10, 2015 by Eric

“Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.”

In a different aspect of my life I’m working with a web developer to create a new web site (professional, day job type stuff). He gave me a link to the page he’d got pulled together and asked me to check it out. When I did, I saw the above text and was completely distracted. I couldn’t decide what language it was, but my first thought was Latin. I have never been particularly good with languages, but as soon as I saw this I wanted to know what he was posting up on our website – even if it was “just a place holder”.

As it turns out that’s exactly what it is. It’s a place holder that’s been used since the days of typesetting and was started back in the 1500s. It’s average text spacing (I guess) and is meant to fill up space without actually distracting you with what it says. I suppose most people would look at it and just skip it as unreadable. I of course couldn’t let it go – I was completely distracted by it – and ended up learning something new!

It’s good to be distracted sometimes.

Influence

Posted on December 6, 2015 by Eric

I’ve talked to a lot of people and written a number of blog posts about the influence that Dungeons and Dragons had on me growing up. I’ve seen more and more people putting forth that yes, they in fact were part of this movement too – or that they were directly inspired by the development of the game industry. Little things can have massive influence or they can be what keeps somebody tethered to reality. Sometimes the tether doesn’t hold as they rise so far so fast – but the memories others have will still be there. It’s important to remember that even the people we see in the media, behind all that hype and glamour, they are still people. This news bit doesn’t surprise me as much as it might others. Scott Weiland was a gamer too. Once upon a time Marilyn Manson was a kid named Brian who’s grandma wouldn’t let him in the house if he was all made up*. Knowing people before they got super famous will give a different perspective.

People connect through role playing games and board games. It’s part of the realm of Fandom I really love. Get out there, find some friends and play a game.

(*important note – that Manson story is indirect, from a friend of mine – it is not my own. It’s always amazing to me how these sort of things crop up in conversation.)

Shenaniganator – or – Philcon 2015

Posted on November 28, 2015 by Eric

It’s been a week since I participated in Philcon 2015. I have held off a week in writing up my review partially because it was Thanksgiving week and that meant a busy schedule and partially because I wanted to take some time to consider how best to write up my thoughts on the whole venture. For anyone who has been with me for a while here at the Pretend Blog, I did remember my socks this year.

Last year was the first time I’d attended as an invited guest and I was a little surprised to have gotten another invitation this year ~ not through any misdeed or indiscretion, I just hadn’t really given it much thought. Thankfully I was able to secure a room and once again have the fantastic option of riding with my friend Mary. Travel and check in were smooth sailing.

There were a number of friends in attendance, but a more than significant number of friends that were not this year. The lack of attendance was palpable to me. There were empty seats in the lobby, empty seats at the hotel bar, empty seats in the gaming area and lots of empty seats in the panel rooms. I missed seeing many of my friends. I had commented last year on how the attendance felt really low to me, and this year seemed worse to me. Once again, I don’t have numbers to back me up or any kind of data for that matter. It’s just a feeling, but a feeling based on simple observation like: I could put my arms out to my sides and not hit anyone or anything in the dealers room. There wasn’t anything even vaguely resembling a crowd even in the middle of Saturday afternoon. Not encouraging.

Panels were totally up and down. I had six for the weekend and they all subjects I could speak to with some form of knowledge. I think that says good things about programming. Yes, the information about the panels arrived a little later than one might want (it was plenty of time for me as a non-moderator), but I did not ever encounter the “well I have no idea why I’m on this panel” person.

I really enjoyed the first panel called “Judging a Book By Its Cover” on Friday. Ray Ridenour was a good moderator and the panel was quite diverse. It was nice to have all the bases covered with Ray’s insight as an artist, a publisher and an author on the panel. I was really hoping to meet the editor that had been scheduled to be there, but he didn’t make it.

I also learned a great deal from the panel Military Culture In Science Fiction. It was easily the best attended panel of mine for the weekend. I did my best to have solid input to this panel but frequently found myself listening and getting caught up in what the others were saying.

I’d have to say the first was probably the best for the weekend for me. Most were decent. They did not all go well in my humble opinion. I’m not going to detail each panel, but when an audience member approaches you and another author after the panel and offers to buy you both a drink just for getting through I suspect the reviews wouldn’t be stellar.

The small panel attendance did have one big advantage. I had the chance to really chat with both the folks I was on the panel with and some of the folks in the audience. It was really good to meet others that are fans and genuinely interested in what others were working on. I might have even gotten folks to check out Watch The Skies so we can keep the connections rolling through the rest of the year.

Lastly, and I think somewhat sadly, I came to the conclusion over that convention weekend that I am no longer a Shenanigan-ator. I am not really even a good participant at this point. After really talking up and enjoying the memories of Defend The Pizza I know that Sawney Hatton was disappointed when nothing even remotely resembling a brawl happened on either Friday or Saturday night. The room parties on Saturday night were… not exactly what you would normally see as a party I think. We (and by we I mean the people I was with) decided we needed something to happen – and so the great game of Elevator Roulette was invented. I genuinely laughed the hardest at the convention goers that exited their elevator cab cane first much to Sawney’s chagrin. The details are fuzzy. I really enjoyed watching that, but was somewhat relieved it wasn’t my elevator that opened. I don’t think I would have carried things off as well as the others there. I am sure they would have been disappointed then and I know they were disappointed when they moved ahead with the “something needs to happen” concept. I will totally own the simple fact that I decided not to crash the reception that was sharing the hotel. I don’t know when I stopped being the shenanigans guy – but it was pretty clear this past weekend that I am no longer that guy. Maybe I’ll come back around to it some day.

Someday. As I typed that I had to genuinely wonder how many somedays Philcon has left. I don’t want to be the pessimist here, but this year didn’t convince me the downward slide has stopped. I do hope they pick up next year. I also hope they’re willing to invite me again and that I’ll have the chance to once again see friends and find out who the Shenanigan-ator will be.

100 From Amazon

Posted on October 9, 2015 by Eric

Amazon posted a list titled “100 Science Fiction & Fantasy Books to Read in a Lifetime”.

I know why people put lists out there. I often find them lazy attempts to fill blog space that would otherwise have nothing to say, but from time to time the infamous ‘they’ find one that resonates with me – and that’s why they do it. They want you to react. The more you react the more people you know go there to see what all the hubbub is about (and the more traffic they get the better the odds of making money).

I couldn’t resist this one. I went there and checked the list out.

I can certainly say I hope when the list is complete you’re not expected to be done with your lifetime. The editors based these choices on personal favorites, vision, character creation and other traits. I looked over the list and broke it down because I really wanted to know. Here’s how the numbers went:

I’ve read 50 of the list. Going back to my fear, that would make me halfway to ‘finished’ and I don’t think I feel good about that. I was a little surprised it was that many, but also a little surprised it wasn’t more. Of the 50 I’ve read there were only 3 that I really hated. I can’t say they shouldn’t be on the list, just that I hated them. That’s around 6% that just didn’t work for me and that’s not bad. The rest were stories I was OK with, liked or really loved.

I expected to see The Hobbit on there, and it was. I didn’t see anything by Morcock (Elric stuff) and was surprised by that. I wouldn’t have liked it particularly, but I expected it. I saw the Thomas Covenant stuff on there and I despised that first book. Still do, but I understand why it’s on the list. It was nice to see such a variety of good stuff.

Of the other half – I’d already had 14 of those titles on my “to read” list. I added 17 more based on this list. That puts me at 31 ‘to read” and that will be 81 of the 100. Not shabby. What about the rest?

In among those titles were a dozen where I’ve seen the movie adaptation. There’s a fair argument to be made that I should read those books – and I might. The problem is that while I know intellectually the books are likely far better than the film adaptations, I can’t bring myself to put those up on the list of “to read” until I’ve plowed through all the rest of the ones that I don’t know anything about yet. Should I rush to read Dune? I’ve seen a movie version and part of a television version and I know what those showed me. Do I want to dive into that series? I’m not sure. I’ve liked the other stuff by Herbert that I’ve read (yes, there are other things) but I’m not rushing. Will I ever get there? Maybe.

If you’re like a lot of my friends, you’re thinking to yourself – that still only gets us to 93. What about the other seven books?

OH – those seven. Those are the books that I’m just not interested in. There are various reasons for this and I won’t go into them all but I will give you an example or two. Handmaid’s Tale by Atwood – not interested. She’s had negative things to say about science fiction as a genre in the past and it turned me off to her and her work. Not going there – don’t care how good you think it is. Game of Thrones books – not interested. Yes I tried them. Yes I tried the show too. Martin chucks a child out of a tower in the first chapter. Yeah, I know he lives. Those people suck and I don’t want to read about them. I like people I can root for and I haven’t found a character in there I like. I know how stupid popular it all is. Still not going there. Are there other things by Martin I would read? Maybe. I’ve heard his new book is set in the same world but earlier. I’ve also heard that his Wild Cards stuff is really good.

There is it – the full 100. You should go and check out the list. I’d like to hear where you land in the count and if you shared a similar breakdown.

OH – and I still recommend this one as a fantastic start to a great series:

Guest Spot for Banned Books Week!

Posted on September 29, 2015 by Eric

I was very excited to be invited to write a blog post over at Books Are My Thing this week. That blog post is up there today. Head on over and check it out – and be sure to join in the discussion!

Books Are My Thing

Reflections on my Birthday

Posted on June 3, 2015 by Eric

Today is my birthday, but I don’t celebrate much anymore. I’m in between the joy of being another year older you gain when you’re young and are desperate to reach all the milestones set ahead of you and whatever feeling accompanies the milestone birthdays as you age. I’m not 16, nor am I 60. At 45 I am right in the middle of everything and maybe that’s why I don’t see it as a particularly celebratory occasion?

I don’t want that to sound as if I’m unhappy (and text without emotion and facial expression is often misinterpreted) because I’m not. I’m happier than I ever understood I could be. I have so many things to be thankful for in my life that any list would be woefully short and inevitably I would forget something important (isn’t that a sign of getting old?). My family is healthy and happy. We have a wonderful home in a nice area with good schools. I have some success with work and such a myriad set of hobbies I can’t keep up with them all.

Maybe that gets to the crux of what I’m feeling today. It’s not so much a celebration as another distance marker. A warning if you will. Today is a great reminder that every day should be special. I have often said there are not enough hours in the day. I have, for the most part, said that in the context of another day with long hours at the office and a list of things I need to finish at the house, but the heart of the matter isn’t that at all. When I say that I think, “45 already? How the hell did that happen? I have so many things I want to do. I have so many things I want to share with my daughter. I have so many places I’d like to travel to with my wife… I’m going to run out of time if I’m not using every single day to the fullest!”

I am so grateful for all the good in my life. I’m thrilled to share that with my friends and family. I’m fine with being 45 – I’m right in the middle of all the things! I have a lot going on. I can’t wait to do more, be more and share more. There are so many places, people, things out there I’ll never get to them all – but I’m sure going to try. So in that sense, yeah – it’s a happy birthday.

Balticon – Wrapping up the review

Posted on May 30, 2015 by Eric

Taking my time and reflecting on the convention was a lot more satisfactory than trying to lump all this stuff together.

The weekend was well worth the effort. The panels I was part of were good learning points for me, and hopefully for others. I got to meet, hang out and party with some very cool folks.

The convention attendance looked smaller to me than years past, but it also looked younger and more eager than I’ve seen in a while. That part gives me some hope.

BSFS announce the Guest of Honor for next year and announced that they’ll be moving to a new hotel. I’m torn about this.

The GOH is George R.R. Martin. I am not a fan, but he will certainly draw a crowd. I’m not sure it will be “my” crowd, but attendance should be up. The new hotel is in downtown Baltimore. Many, many folks are excited about this. I am not one of those folks. I remember going to the Omni when Balticon was there and I hated it. Downtown where the parking is expensive and the meals aren’t convenient. I like the current location in Hunt Valley – but that isn’t my choice. I know at least two people that have already decided that convention isn’t for them so they’ll be going elsewhere next year.

I am going. I’ve made the choice already. I know there are a lot of folks very put off by the utter failure of the registration process this year. I’m going to call it an aberration. I definitely think that invited guest should get their own line, but we’ll see how it all turns out next year. I’ll give reg a chance to right itself. I’ll give the venue a chance. It’s not ideal, but I’ll try it. Who knows, it might be amazing. I’ll be happy to be the counter programming to the GOH. Nobody said I have to go to his panels, right? I might even ramp up my art show stuff for next year. I’ve got some time for planning.

Hopefully you’ll have some time for planning and you’ll get yourself out there to a convention too. Maybe you’ll even catch me on a panel someday!

The Pretend Blog

Fan, Author, Artist – Eric Hardenbrook

Category Archives: Personal Observation