She had seen the old movies, heard the old stories. Working alone, in the desert with all the parts she could scrounge she would create her own gateway. The power was not there right now, but it would come. She was Noah for the modern age. She had faith. She would travel, she would survive.
The right light was the key. The creator dabbed a brush, then flipped the next creation off the dock. As the page touched the water it transformed, dropping another creature into the mix. “Perhaps more gray for the next one. Maybe more teeth?”
Once upon a time I used to like to be sure to get to the theater early when going for a movie. I wanted to see all the new movies that would be headed out soon. It was something exciting. Something unexpected could pop up. You never knew, really.
In the current age of on demand everything, trailers for shows and movies are almost constant. I don’t rush to the theater at all – even for the films at this point. It takes something special to make me want to endure dealing with everything that goes along with sitting in a dark room with random strangers to watch a movie. The experience is frequently less than ideal.
I’ve stopped being excited about movie trailers too. On a good day, the creators of film can make an amazing 2 minute film. Most days the either misinterpret the story, sell the wrong point or give away all the best parts just to get you to go see the movie and be disappointed. IF you can slip past the spoilers and see something that actually looks interesting, there is an additional culture now that takes frame by frame screen shots and attempts to dig in and find all sorts of things to be happy/upset/curious about. Then judge the film before it is ever seen based on 3 frames that are pointed out a year before the release date. I am SO not interested in all that. Not at all. The joy has gone away.
Some time ago I was asked how I felt when the very first LOTR series trailer dropped. I waited. I decided I wanted to let all this stuff sit and digest a little. It’s easy to have strong reactions and immediate thoughts. Taking your time and putting thought into it will help decide just how important that strong reaction might be in the long run. If you were upset or interested before, are you still? Just yesterday (as of this writing) the new trailer for the Dungeons and Dragons new movie came out. The reaction culture raced to be the first to comment. I will admit – I did acknowledge this trailer on social media. It’s difficult to skip talking about something you really love. Now I’ve got ‘extra’ trailer bits to discuss.
I’m a fan of the LOTR and some of the film works based on Tolkien’s books. I despise the vast majority of that mess they claim is a trilogy about a hobbit and his journey to the lonely mountain. It’s an abomination and should be stricken from the record. And now it looks like various stories, notes and bits from places like The Silmarillion are being mined and shaped into a series.
I love Dungeons and Dragons and have for a very long time. My disappointment with the last big budget movie with the same title has echoed for twenty years now. I can still clearly picture lipstick bad guy and the horror of seeing the Wayans brother just camping out in there. They’ve waited two decades and now they’re trying again. This fills me with trepidation. It could all go so horribly wrong. The new version has Chris Pine you say. The last one had Jeremy Irons. He’s an academy award winner… and it didn’t help.
So now both of these properties are making headlines with new content. There are big names, big action and all sorts of fantastical things racing across the screens. How do I feel about them? A just question. Late is the hour in which we discuss an old trailer (couldn’t resist mangling the quote).
My feelings are mixed. On the one side, I desperately wish film makers would continue to adapt different works and stop digging back into the same stories over and over again. A good example was the (relatively) recent Shadow & Bone series on Netflix. A fantasy work that is not something that has been done to death (looking at you Robin Hood) and had budget and production value to create something enjoyable. There are hundreds of choices out there… but we’re digging into Tolkien’s old notes to create something so they can say, “Look! Hobbits! You like Hobbits, right?”. It’s not something that’s going to make me happy.
On another side, just look at all the wonderful fantasy that’s out there to pick from! Magic, dragons, sword fights… it’s an embarrassment of riches. There’s so much I have to be picky about what I see, how soon I see it and how much I watch. There aren’t enough hours in the day to consume all the coolest things. I can’t wait to see all the crazy stuff that comes out of the D&D movie. There will be an entire generation of players that will pick druid as a character class, just to wildshape into an owlbear.
On a third side, (this is why I didn’t use hands – polygons give options for sides) I’m afraid this glut of fantasy we’ve been living in is going to cause the dilution of something good. There will be so much that far lower quality things are going to start sneaking in (yes, as they have for ever) and with that interest will fade. When interest fades, the money walks away and THAT is what causes films to not get made. In the end, Hollywood movie studios are in business to make money and if we’re not buying they’re going to sell something else.
On the square side… I’m thrilled to have this kind of stuff out there. I’ve written before about the negative impact the Satanic Panic and all that bunk from my childhood had. Fantastical film and storytelling at this scale was never something imaginable when I was a kid. The shear variety of options is glorious.
Eventually I will devour all of these things. I will rage about some and praise others to inappropriate levels. There will be fan art and philosophical discussions. I’m still a fan after all.
Everything Everywhere All at Once
This was originally published in the Watch The Skies July issue.
The multiverse. A certain MCU character has brought this theory to the attention of the public in recent months. Multiple universe theories, quantum physics, philosophy and all the other Schrodinger equations are generally WAY past my understanding. A version of this theory that I understand is that each choice we make during our lives causes some sort of branch to happen. The alternate choice sort of spins off and becomes another world where our other self continues on that other path. It’s more complicated than that, but that basic thought is the core of this film. What if we made that other choice? Where would that other path have taken us? It’s a thought that runs through most peoples’ heads at some point. I recommend this movie to a science fiction / fantasy based group purely on the strength of using this multiverse theory in an absolutely bonkers way.
What if you could access the knowledge, emotions, life experience of those other lives you might have had? In this movie, a middle aged woman who is struggling with many of the same sort of things any of us struggle with is suddenly confronted with this access… and is told she needs to use this knowledge to save the world. She needs to reach out and draw from those lives and the knowledge those other versions of her have gained.
Michelle Yeoh, Stephanie Hsu and Ke Huy Quan are absolutely fantastic in their roles. They are all believable, earnest and relatable, even when the entire world around them seems to be going mad. There is a randomness to this film that would be hard to ride if they weren’t just so good. There is action, humor and romance. I don’t know that any single genre or category would do this movie justice. Absurdist fits, but isn’t fair to the beauty of the performances and the depth of the feelings that show through. There is another big name movie star in the film. This big name star is so deeply into the role that I didn’t realize that’s who it was while I was watching.
Do yourself a favor, stay away from spoilers – even the trailer honestly – and just check this movie out. It’s only just leaving theaters and headed to DVD or home streaming, but it’s worth the effort. You should be watching this movie.
Is terrible.
That’s a simple view, I know. It’s one of those easy to say, difficult to quantify kind of things – to some degree. There are clear examples of what is wrong. Those are the easy ones. It exists in more than one form, and it relates to so many levels of what we do in the science fiction and fantasy fan communities.
I’ve been sitting on this one for a while. It’s a tough topic. I expect somebody will dig this up and that it will cause me problems in the future. This is why it’s on MY site. I own it. It’s mine. I have taken some time and given this much thought and I think it’s important to continue this conversation. That’s the key to all of this. It’s a conversation. It’s something we need to address now and as we move forward. There is no simple solution and there is no easy way to make this go. We need to keep communicating with each other.
Let’s start with the easy stuff. There are some people out there who think, for some unknown reason, that they should be the ‘real’ fans of Star Wars. They’ve declared some nonsense about how people who are not white Americans can’t and shouldn’t ever be in the movies that have been loved since 1977. They’re easy to spot. They’re terrible. There’s simply no place in fandom for people that can’t accept that people who make up less than 12% of the entire world population don’t rule everything and can’t exclude everyone else. Above and beyond a basic level of stupidity, there is no place in civil society for those who make death threats against actors for portraying a character in a movie. That’s a kind of crazy that slides into another topic entirely (we’ve created our own hell-scape of cults of personality) and isn’t what I want to get at here. If you want to read more, check this article out as a starting point. There are lots of conversations going on out there about it.
The part that’s much more difficult to deal with is at a very personal level. It happens far too often these days and it worries me for the future of fandom for a whole different reason. Toxicity is eating away at the core of fandom – from both sides. The grievance crowd is going to destroy fandom.
Being the vocal minority doesn’t make you right no matter how right you believe you are. When somebody says something you don’t agree with, it doesn’t mean you are allowed to have them thrown out of the building. If your feelings get hurt it doesn’t mean the other person is automatically a bigot, problematic or any other sort of label YOU believe they should carry. When you think you want to lash out at others, you need to ask why you feel this way and maybe… just maybe… take a step back and allow some time to think about things.
We are all guilty of this to some degree at some point in our lives. We are emotional creatures. We react. We want to defend ourselves and those we care for. It’s natural. IF you’ve been the person that has been slighted, ignored, insulted and treated badly all of your life this is something that builds. This feeling turns into something ugly and dangerous. How we conduct ourselves when these sort of things come up matters.
What am I trying to say? Let me start with my own example. I have worked on convention staffs for many years. I love helping make something for so many people to enjoy. There are challenges, but anything worth doing has those. I have worked with all sorts of people from all over. Fans are great folks and have made some of the most wonderful memories for me. I volunteered to help with the previous world con, a staff team I hadn’t worked with before. I was trying to find my way and see where I could fit in and help. Then the GOH mess went down and I withdrew my help. Did you catch the part about it being volunteers? Yeah, even if you pay me I’m not hanging around for that. The most worrisome part was this was accepted. Not questioned, just accepted.
I wrote about it in a previous post here. Back in February of 2021 in fact. So here we are a year and a half later and I think the issue has only gotten worse. I don’t want people to think this is some kind of ‘crying out’ because I feel like I’m being repressed or something. I’m clearly not repressed or disadvantaged. I know there is privilege living here and I try to be mindful of it. I’m also don’t want this to be a ‘virtue signal’ kind of bullshit. I can’t stand that. “Look at how wonderful and accepting I am! I’m clearly not the problem you’re talking about…” Ugh!
Maybe I am the problem. I don’t know that without talking to others and having them talk to me.
Here’s where the real challenges start. Yeah, I’m a middle aged white guy. I know a lot of other people who look just like me. That’s who I have always associated with. It’s culturally my background and that has a huge influence on my opinions and bias. I have been told more than once that my opinion doesn’t matter simply because I’m a white male. I’ve been told to get over being told that. I’ve been given the ‘so how does it feel’ bit. I’ve been excluded from conversations and told that project submissions were only open to ‘others who need a chance’. While it wasn’t me, but a friend – there was even something in writing, “Well, you’re an old white guy so you must have done something wrong…”. In writing. From a supposedly professional group.
Really? We can’t find it now, but give us time? You’re a white guy so all the problems are your fault? This is all the wrongs of history that (may or may not have) happened to me so now I’m giving those to you! Take that medicine you horrifying bigot!
So, back to the maybe I’m the problem part. OK. Fine. Maybe I am. I can accept that I need to be more mindful than I am and work harder to be better. I certainly try, but success is relative to viewpoint. There are lots of places looking to get more diverse work out there and I don’t qualify for that in this field. OK. I’ll take it.
This didn’t just happen to me. It’s happening over and over again with people taking advantage of the simple fact that people have started to pay attention to what’s being said and taking action on it. Grievance culture. It’s insidious because how do you argue against things like, “you can’t call that person a freak just because they don’t look like you”? You don’t. You can’t. Even when the definition of the word freak is, “A person, animal or plant with an unusual physical abnormality”. Webster be damned! You can’t point that sort of thing out! How dare you?
Where’s the line? When can you tell anyone else what to say, how to think about something or how to address a situation? We’re all products of our own cultural backgrounds. What if I make a mistake? Am I to be punished and then banished forever? Who is the arbitrator of that judgment? Public opinion is fickle and dangerous. Swaying with and allowing the grievance crowd to simply take over is going to destroy volunteer run conventions… faster and more certainly than aging out or poor attendance ever had a chance to.
Don’t believe me?
At this past Balticon (#56) a woman of color living with a debilitating physical condition, parent of a trans person, and long time panelist and guest was summarily chucked out due to a complaint. A single complaint.
I was there when they came to get her. It was the panel I was moderating. I was standing there. I can’t speak for how others feel, but the lone staffer seemed quite respectful when asking her to gather up her things and accompany him to con-ops. He wasn’t loud and he did not make any accusations while there. He didn’t express anything other than, “please come with me, we’ll talk elsewhere”. It was a very simple and quiet thing that most had no concept about anything happening at all. I feel that the characterization of being treated ‘criminally’ is inaccurate, but again – that’s from the outsider point of view. In the end, that little bit that I witnessed isn’t important but it gives context for the rest of my message. They weren’t coming for me… this time.
I regret not digging into things more while I was there. I attempted (successfully) to steer clear of personal drama. I attend and work cons as a matter of enjoyment, and I find that type of drama stressful rather than enjoyable. Maybe I needed to do or say more… but there’s a problem with that. The grievance crowd. How can I help when my opinion doesn’t matter or is discounted or ignored out of hand?
This isn’t about me, but this whole post is to explain where I’m coming from. The only thing any intervention by me would have done is muddy the waters (at best) or cause a significantly bigger issue (at worst). I have been seeing a distressing trend in fandom – pushing people away rather than working with them and trying to relate to them. I have been called a racist, accepting of racists, problematic and told flat out to my face that I’m a white, straight (assumed), middle aged man and therefore part of the problem and that it’s not possible for me to be part of the solution. I have been marginalized by my appearance and had power taken from me on that basis. What it looks like to me, in a deeply oversimplified way, is that those who have suffered that treatment before are now taking any and every opportunity to do that to others rather than working to make things better for everyone. Sort of a ‘how do you like it’ approach to being in power.
Conventions are not my direct livelihood, nor to they help or hinder my day job. My reputation in the convention circuit doesn’t stop me from putting food on the table for my family. Conventions are some people’s livings or a significant portion of them. Their standing and reputation there matters. If somebody came at my job in that way I’d be more than angry – and rightfully so. The person in question is a pro and while I have found her point of view odd at times, I have never felt that it wasn’t important. I love the stuff she brings to panels. Having diverse opinions matters. Having authors like her, and so many others is vital. I’m sorry that she won’t be back (and if I were her, I wouldn’t be either).
The culture of con running is in trouble. This is not the first time I’ve encountered a mess like this. It’s the reason I won’t work on con staff for other cons anymore. There’s part of me that’s very sad about this. I do love doing all these wonderful, creative things.
So long as I’m unfailingly polite and professional there’s nothing to latch onto as a complaint. Maybe I need to say more. I deeply believe that the science fiction and fantasy community needs to be more accepting and welcoming. I said, specifically at the panel I moderated, “If you can’t find that person, be that person…” and gave some examples. I will continue to go to Balticon (and others) if they’ll have me (I understand that I’m a ‘D’-lister that just fills space). I think there’s a dangerous culture growing around the idea of ‘you didn’t say exactly the right thing’, and I fear for the future of convention staffs across the board. I hope by continuing to attend that I can in some way be part of the solution. I told people I wasn’t going to virtue signal and I don’t want this to sound like that. I am, however, going to reach out to people about this when I have the chance. I want to stand up for others. I want the toxicity to go away. I’m sick to death of the grievance crowd. I want fans to be able to keep doing the things they love. I hope to be able to continue to have important and meaningful conversations about making cons a safe and accepting place for everyone. I hope you’ll join the conversation too.
The workshop I ran was the last of my panels at Balticon.
The workshop was GMing for Beginners. It’s exactly what it sounds like. If you hadn’t run a game before, but wanted to. IF you had, but you stumbled or wanted tips to get to the next level sort of thing. In short, my wheelhouse. I’ve been doing this for years.
Turns out the hardest part of all that is going back to the start.
It was a very small group of folks that showed up in person. The panel description stated it was aimed at a younger demographic and that’s precisely the folks that showed up. They were fun and creative and our hour melted away and then some. We were still sitting there when the hotel staff came and asked us to give up the space for the next event.
There was a part of me that really wanted to do pictures and notes and all sorts of things related to what we did, but I think that would take something away from the folks that were there in person. I was absolutely delighted to share with them. I hope they enjoyed it as much as I did (and they did seem to). I will probably ask to run that workshop again next year, though perhaps earlier in the weekend to give folks that want to try things out more of a chance to hit the game room.
In the end, the con was very successful for me. I’m glad I went. I’m glad to be getting back into the con circuit and working on being creative again. It’s been a rough couple of years for everyone. I’m looking forward to going again. I’m looking forward to meeting new people and seeing my old friends again.
Will I see you there?
I don’t spend a lot of time here talking about day to day stuff in my life. There’s been a trend over the past few years to do exactly that – share every waking moment. I don’t believe I’m that interesting. I don’t believe there is anyone that interesting. Sometimes day to day stuff just needs to be unexceptional and plain. It gives both context and contrast to the things that are special or that hold more significance.
My family has had some special moments lately and has a couple of those coming up. The public doesn’t get everything. Some things are just for us.
What is not just for us is finally being in a position to try to do more to help others in our day to day lives here at Chez Hardenbrook. We’re getting solar power added to the house.
Adding solar power should be something easy, affordable and common but it sadly is not. Affordable alternative power is slow in coming to the residential market here in the US. We’ve looked at it for years now and simply haven’t had the money or been in a position where we could afford to add the equipment needed to our house. We have finally gotten there, and we signed the deal this past Friday.
Is it immediate? Of course not. During the height of the sunniest time of year for us here in the middle of Pennsylvania all we can do is sign up and wait. There’s a process to getting all this work lined up, the parts ordered, and of course the regulatory things squared away (building permit, utility permission, etc.). What does that mean? It means we’re going solar… eventually. IF everything works out, we should get a series of panels added to our roof sometime in early October this year. Just in time for the weather to turn grey, the days to get shorter and the actual amount of power we created to drop right off.
In the end, this isn’t about immediate returns. This is about making long term choices for the betterment of everyone. Over the course of the next year we should generate enough power that we don’t actually have to draw from the power grid. The next step along the way is getting a power generator or battery source set up so that when / if the power grid goes out we can continue to use that electricity we’re making.
Small steps, but consistent ones. Plan for the future in small steps and make it happen. Do what you can to help. Hopefully this step is a good one.
The last actual panel I had was on Sunday morning. There was a workshop to run later in the day, but this was the last of the traditionally formatted panels. As it turned out, I was also scheduled to be the moderator. As a moderator, I didn’t prepare notes in the same way I would have for other panels. I went for questions. My job was to get the other panelists to talk about the topic and keep things moving.
Finding Your People:
Whether you are a writer, gamer, costumer, maker, filker, or LARPer, there is a thriving community for you. Panelists will discuss opportunities for attendees to connect with like-minded others outside of Balticon.
I based my questions on things I believed would be useful from my own experiences. I wanted the folks I was working with to be able to express their thoughts on connecting with others and providing a way for cons and game groups and costumers and all those crazy folks to still be able to get together and enjoy our hobbies like never before. Interestingly / sadly this was also the panel where I caught the fringes of how this all goes wrong. I’ve got a lot of thoughts on the subject, so I’m going to dedicate an entire post to that at a later date. Other than what amounted to a minor ‘blip’ for me, the panel seemed to go well enough. A lot of the answers tended to circle back around to finding connections via the web, but that’s the world we live in these days.
Do you have any great answers for the questions above?
Saturday’s list of panels wrapped up with one on recommendations for reading. I was ready, but also worried for this panel. While I have read a lot, my reading has suffered lately. The volume of words I have consumed has dropped off sharply. It’s been a struggle to read sometimes. The weight of things going on around me has made even the escapism of a good book work. Couple this with the folks on the panel were clearly experts in the field, while my qualifications amounted to being part of a fan group with a long reading list. As it turned out, a really skillful panel moderator made this one run! At the end there was only one request for finding “something else like this” we couldn’t come up with an answer for. At the end of the day, I think I held my own. The things I go back to the most tend to be older works and not the most recently released stuff, but I managed. Here’s the description and the panel notes I had going in.
What Should I Read Next?
While it’s easy for us to be bombarded with automated algorithm-derived suggestions, it’s important to get book recommendations from a dialogue with a real person. Our well-read panelists will listen to what you like and don’t like and suggest something you haven’t heard of… we hope.
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Hope is right – this tends to be a very well read crowd.
I keep a list of books shelved in the dining room. They are books that I go back to over and over again when talking about books. Some examples are:
Magic for Sale (short story collection)
Light of Other Days (Stephen Baxter / Clarke)
Bimbos of the Death Sun (Sharon McCrumb)
Pandora’s Legions (Christopher Anvil)
Song in Stone (Walter Hunt)
Rollback (Robert J Sawyer)
Bureau 13 (Pollata)
Griffin & Sabine (Nick Bantock) series of mysterious letters
Immortal warrior Kane (pulp fantasy series) Karl Edward Wagner
House in the Cerulean Sea (T.J. Klune)
Written in Red (Anne Bishop)
Find a small press!
Talk with booksellers (Cupboard Maker Books in Enola PA is my favorite by far!)
Watch the Skies has a 20+ year reading list. You can always jump on and chat with us! Connect with us here!
Saturday rolled on with more gaming, and a topic I love even more than board games, role playing games.
You Can Start GMing Now: Tips for First-Time Gms
If you want to play RPGs and you don’t have a GM, you should consider stepping up. You don’t have to be an expert on fantasy lore or a master rules lawyer; anyone can be a GM. We’ll talk about common struggles like setting expectations, keeping everyone at the table engaged, finding and playing to your own unique strengths and style, and the hardest part of it all, battling the demons of three to five other people’s schedules.
My personal house Rule #1: It’s just a game.
We’re here to have fun, and if we’re not having fun, then why are we doing it?
Find inspiration (in art, in books, in movies, in conversation with others). I’ve talked about this in other places before – Attacks Of Opportunity being one example.
Prepare to the amount you feel comfortable with, over or under prepared is relative to how you play.
Roll with choices your players make – be flexible – because they WILL change it all. Constantly.
Adapt encounters that were ‘missed’ into something else later in the campaign (save your work).
Keep a list of names (like sounding names from a similar area – on hand just in case random NPC).
Keep notes – particularly of who all those random NPCs are, b/c they might stick and come back (melon guy from Avatar the Last Airbender anyone?)
Feel free to watch shows like critical role – but understand what they’ve got going on behind the scenes (and if you don’t have that, how can your game match that?).
Those were my notes, and many of the other panelists / game masters seemed to share some if not all of those sentiments. There was a lot to pack in during our hour, so I think we did well, but it’s always a challenge. Gaming is such a wide ranging topic it’s tough to squeeze all that in during an hour.
I’ve been running various D&D games for years so there are a lot of things I’ve internalized. Have you run a game? Do you have any thoughts for first timers?