I had a lot of fun with this particular video. I hope you get the chance to listen and check out how you end up as a professional dungeon master!
Author Archives: Eric
Fart Quest
I’m combining both of my reviews for the series on this page for any folks that don’t happen to have (or maybe don’t want) access to Goodreads. I have been using that site to track my books for quite some time now, but sharing here also means I get to keep some small part of what I write down here.
BOOK 1
Fart Quest by Aaron Reynolds
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
I read this today ~ all of it. I’m delighted that I picked it up. I am planning to write out a longer, more detailed review when I finish reading the second book.
FUN!
BOOK 2
The Barf of the Bedazzler by Aaron Reynolds
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
The second book in the series Fart Quest was just as amusing as the first one. I had fun reading this one. Yes, it’s aimed at kids. Yes, it’s still essentially an extended fart joke HOWEVER – there’s a good story in there too.
The companions that are travelling and having adventures together learn valuable lessons along the way. While these things are being done, the book itself is actually introducing kids to some of the concepts of role playing games – including experience points and levelling up.
I don’t have an elementary schooler anymore, but these are exactly the sort of books I’d be reading with a kid in that age group. I’m really glad I picked this series up.
View all my reviews
Withdrawal
I had big plans for stuff this weekend. I did. Somehow the wheels came off that vehicle and here I am skidding to a stop on a Sunday night facing another long work week where I doubt my productivity improves. This is another one of those “heavy sigh” posts. IF you don’t want to stick with it, I understand. Short version – I withdrew from being part of the con staff team for Discon / World Con.
Some of you know that I was part of convention staffs for many years. It’s a volunteer thing, but it was being part of the fandom community. We had something really special and we made a lot of folks happy. Then that all stopped, rather abruptly. When it stopped I decided that being a department head and helping create a positive convention atmosphere could be handled by others and decided to focus on growing my own presence as an author or an artist as a guest at conventions. While it was still work, I did what I could to make it an enjoyable thing. I really do love it when fan groups get together.
A friend suggested / recruited me to be part of the team that is putting together the World Science Fiction convention this year. I was a little hesitant because I know the work that goes into pulling together a smaller con – world con was going to be significantly bigger than that. I decided I would be part of the team. I know how it all works but I wouldn’t be in charge of anything or anyone – I could just work hard and help out.
Some folks in the fan community are aware of the controversy surrounding the con breaking ties with the person they invited as the editor guest of honor. This has become a significant mess – and I sympathize with the people being put in a position where they are forced to deal with this. There was no way everyone was coming out happy after all was said and done.
The problem – and here’s where it gets to the part about *me* – is that it has brought out some of the worst behavior in the fan community I’ve ever seen. Bluntly, it’s extremely disappointing. I withdrew my support from the convention and left the staff. No, it won’t likely have much of an impact on them. No, I am not writing this as some kind of side picking or declarations of “correctness” for the community at large. It’s because there’s something more important that I think we can all work on.
Here is a slightly edited version of what I wrote to the folks that needed to know on the con staff:
The recent controversy surrounding the removal of a GOH is the starting point, but not wholly the cause for my withdrawal.
The first I heard of this was seeing an ’emergency meeting’ with regards to this being posted. It was the single night of the week that I didn’t have a meeting, but calling something an emergency does tend to garner attention. I signed on.
While on the zoom meeting, and within the first 5 minutes of my presence there, one of the attendees (and I’m sorry that I didn’t stay to record his name for later reference) declared that if you were associated with this Baen board you were either a racist or you were tolerant of racists. Sweeping generalizations about people he doesn’t know and has never met based on a single piece of information. He declared ME a racist or tolerant of racists. He’s never met me. He never saw me. He simply decided that the members of a particular group could be easily labeled and lumped together. Tell me again what everyone’s upset about? I left when the shouting started. I do not have time for that.
There continued to be a lot of talk – and I have been following along. From discord (staff server, not public) – so I don’t mangle the wording:
but I can only apologize for my own bad behavior. It’s no excuse that some of the other children were being naughty as well.
The “I was bad but so were others?” defense? Really? My daughter does better than that. You’ll say “he apologized” but was it really an apology or just an “oops I got called out”? Because there certainly was no retraction there.
“…but I can see the concern about losing people if she goes too. I just don’t figure we want those people.” (emphasis mine)
“Those people”? What sort of person does that sound like?
This is all coming up during the week with some of the most challenging weather conditions in a century across the country (including loss of power for con chair), but waiting until the weekend to make further announcement (after potential meetings, discussion and thoughtful consideration) was unacceptable and we need to have a vehement response immediately?
For the record, advocating violence is not acceptable. Yes the convention should and has made it clear that attendees will be safe. None of that is wrong. Civilized free speech ends when your speech declares the existence of others needs to end. It is not acceptable. Painting with the same paint, just pushing the brush in a different direction is not different, nor acceptable either – and that’s exactly what the “team” has done. It doesn’t feel like a team and certainly doesn’t seem very welcoming to me – never really has. This just cemented it.
I realize that my family’s health issues have kept me from being more assistance than I would normally be for con staff, but stepping directly back into that has made me believe my time, effort and emotional well being would be better off doing something else. IF people on the team want to wrap themselves in a blanket of self righteousness and deal in absolutes while casting unfounded aspersions at other people on the team they’ve never met, I don’t have the willingness to try to be part of this.
Thank you for taking the time to read this if you’ve hung on this far.
That was what I sent, but I want to emphasize something here. WE are ALL responsible for our own behavior. Each person must consider what they are saying and how they go about putting their words out toward others. Words have power. Words have meaning. Turning the same type of words, set in the exact same kind of argument framing as those you argue against back toward them will never help. The convention staff is a microcosm of where we are as a whole in the fan community. People are using the slight anonymity of an online presence to say things they would never say if they were standing face to face with the same people. I am frustrated and saddened that it has reached this point, but I feel that leaving the staff of something I was very much looking forward to was important for my own well being.
I’m going to focus on continuing to build an open, accepting and welcoming fan presence with Watch The Skies. I hope that will be something that fans can work with and share in building.
You Should Be Watching
This was previously published in Watch The Skies fanzine – February 2021 – Dust.
I attempt to keep the recommendations for this article series away from one specific network or subscription service. Focus that lands entirely on Netflix would rapidly exclude and push away any reader that didn’t have, or didn’t want a subscription to that particular service. In that spirit, this particular article covers one short film individually, but I want to highly recommend going to the channel itself. Dust is on YouTube. It features dozens of films ranging in length between two and twenty minutes. They’re great for a quick hit of science fiction. As long as you can get to YouTube, you can watch them all for free. As I scrolled the various videos available there I realized I’d seen at least one of them before, some years ago. The short film “The Black Hole” lasts just under three minutes and is just as good now as it was four years ago. There’s a lot to see and recommend this channel to science fiction fans.
I was spurred on to writing this by a recent article over at IO9 pointing out the short film “Avarya”. I won’t go into depth on this film because it is certainly short and I don’t want to give too much away. I will say that as science fiction fans, and particularly those familiar with the three laws of robotics, this one is really well done. Fantastic animation, great voices and just the right length (coming in at 19:31) to fill a quick lunch time bump or give some inspiration between binge watches. It does take a bit of a dark turn as the article title suggests, so be warned!
Go and subscribe to Dust and see all the excellent films available there!
Flash Prompt – Tourism
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Kid Cosmic
Normally I’d put this sort of thing under the “You Should Be Watching” section of Watch The Skies, but I feel that a lot of members of the group would find the fact that I keep going back to animated television shows aimed at kids to be problematic. Since I am a dad, I find myself leaning toward these shows more and more, even when my own kid isn’t completely interested. I say “isn’t completely interested” because often times she will jump in halfway through something I’m watching. It’s not cool when I suggest it (because what kid wants to think their parents are cool or know anything, right?) but then gets caught by the actual show.
This is the case with Kid Cosmic. I can’t call it a subversion of the super hero genre, but it is certainly an interesting look at that genre and what sort of effect that genre has on kids. This hits close to home for me because I remember all the times when I was a kid that I watched Spiderman (as part of the Electric Company show I believe) and then went directly out to play and imitate that hero.
~ Side note ~ Yes, kids have always done this. Imitating what they see is part of developing who they will become. Yes, it can be dangerous. It was then and it is now. Teaching kids safety will ever only go so far. Pushing boundaries is part of being a kid. One of my earliest memories of being a super hero ended with a trip to the hospital for stitches. It’s going to continue to happen. If you’re a parent too, be prepared.
Kid Cosmic actually takes this whole concept head on. The star of the show is steeped in the heroic stories of comic books. He’s got energy and enthusiasm to spare. He finds cosmic stones in a crashed space ship and just knows to his core that he’s supposed to become a hero and save the planet. He scoops up the stones and does his level best to prepare to be a hero. The problem with this prep is that he really sucks at it. Constantly.
In an interview about the project, the creator (Craig McCracken) states that was at least part of his point, “It’s just part of being a kid, and I like the idea of exploring that fantasy, but also this blind confidence that they’re going to be immediately great at it.”
It’s a dose of realism in a genre that is packed with over the top expectations. A short, ten episode season is available on Netflix right now. My daughter and I have watched them all. There’s a good, solid message in the show along with some very entertaining moments. Definitely worth checking out if you’re into the super hero genre, kids fantasy shows, or just good writing.
Bucks?
I’ve railed against the stagnation of ideas (based on bankroll rather than creative capitol) in the past. I don’t need another version of Dune, King Arthur, or Lord forbid Robin Hood. Seriously… move on. Find one of the hundreds of fantasy books out there to work from. I mean it. I am really not looking forward to a LOTR series, no matter who’s making it. I saw the abomination that was what they did to the Hobbit. I am really uncertain about the series they’re planning based in the world of Willow. There’s just a lot of stuff out there that strikes me as a particularly bad idea.
Having said all of that, there was one mentioned that I might be able to get behind.
There’s a report out that says George Clooney may be attached to a remake of Buck Rogers. A couple of parts to unpack there.
First, while I don’t always like the work that Clooney does, I respect that it’s generally fresh and worthy. There are a number of things he’s been part of that are quite good. I enjoyed his part in O Brother Where Art Thou and thought that was a fantastic remake of the Odyssey. This is one of the things that gives me hope for this remake or restart or whatever name they put on it these days. IF you’re going to re-imagine a story, get clever. Change the time frame, update the language, make it accessible to a more modern audience.
Second, while I was a fan of the television show when it aired back in 79/80 that wasn’t the original series. Buck has been around since the 1920s. He had a couple of big radio show runs and was a staple in the comics industry for a lot of years. I also wanted to say I was a “big fan” but I was far more interested in / taken with Battlestar Galactica. That show was easily a bigger hit with me. Gil Gerard and Erin Gray did a fantastic job making a disjointed show work… but even as a kid I saw that it was just that – disjointed.
So, I’m going to hold out hope for this one. I think an excellent space show would do really well right now. We haven’t aged ourselves up to the date when the title character is supposed to “wake up” in the future, so there’s still a ton of room to work with. Hopeful.
Are there any other “remake” candidates you think might actually work?
Called Out
I have spent a fair amount of time lately talking about Dungeons & Dragons. It’s a hobby that has been with me (almost) all of my life. It has impacted me deeply and changed a number of things for me. I love the game. I have written and spoken with others before about the scars left by the years of the Satanic Panic and how it forever changed my view on many things. What I have never, ever considered is what sort of impact this game that is so meaningful to me would have on somebody that doesn’t look like me, or that didn’t grow up in an environment like mine.
A friend of mine recently posted an article about fantasy role playing being racist to its core. I was a little shocked by this accusation. Only a little shocked as I’d been hearing some rumblings about it, but never anything direct or clearly called out. The article did just that. It pointed directly to all the things that other people found completely wrong and racist that I hadn’t given any thought to. I didn’t ignore this on purpose, it was simply that it literally never occurred to me. Never gave it a thought.
That – the complete thoughtless nature of that statement – is ample evidence of living deeply ensconced in white privilege. I can say that I have not been, nor do I believe that I am a racist – but the pure ignorance of the situation does not help, nor does it lend itself to any believable argument supporting my statement.
Story telling has always been my jam when it comes to D&D. I routinely bend or ignore rules that don’t suit my story or my willingness to slow a good story down. I have just accepted the parts of the kit as given and used them to tell stories. I don’t (for the most part) limit my players if they wish to mix and match things that the rules say don’t work or stop them from playing anything against type. The problem is that the “type” exists. I don’t know how to fix that.
Everyone believes they are the hero of their own story. It’s a sweeping generalization that ignores the core of the problem, but it does show a certain something that I struggle with in story telling. I have come to despise the “misunderstood” villain. Yes, there are tragic stories out there. Yes, some people do the wrong things trying to achieve an admirable goal. At some point there needs to be a line drawn. There is such a thing as “bad”. Sure, Dracula might have a tragic love story involved somewhere in there, but he eats people. He’s not misunderstood, he’s a monster. He’s the bad guy. Stories need a ‘bad guy’ to work against. Someone to hinder the hero, work against them and provide the ability to learn and grow past a certain point.
One of my favorite antagonists of all time is the operative in the movie Serenity. Above and beyond the simple fact that Chiwetel Ejiofor is a fantastic actor and does amazing work with that part – the operative is a fantastic ‘bad guy’. He’s relentless. He does all the things you think he shouldn’t do, all the things that make him a monster. He does it because he believes he’s doing the right thing. His belief that he’s on the side of right is absolute. Having a believable and nuanced antagonist is critical to a good story.
Does the ‘bad guy’ have to be the black guy? I hadn’t ever really given it any thought, but others might read into it differently. I want to argue that the color of the actor, doing a magnificent job delivering that part, doesn’t matter BUT I’m not the one routinely experiencing racial prejudice. Tying this back to D&D, do the Orcs have to be the ‘bad guy’? Are there people that read into the race of orc a representation of black people? It’s not an easy question. Are they “evil” simply for being born to a group that is not your own? Doesn’t seem right to think that way. There are rules and statistics connected to what race a character can be in D&D that certainly show a racist bias (and to be fair I only see this now because it’s been pointed out to me). It could be a case of ‘it’s always been that way’ and I’ve been unknowingly perpetuating something that others find deeply offensive simply by enjoying my favorite hobby as it has always been.
Some folks have taken this topic on head first. There is a Kickstarter out there (that has already funded) creating alternate rules for D&D 5e that eliminate the racial based parts of character creation and replace it with ancestry and culture to explain starting bonuses and penalties. I really like the concept. I may buy the supplement to adapt into my own games even though I don’t play 5e. It’s a system that seems to make a lot of sense. It’s certainly worth checking out.
I’m hopeful that since this systemic racial problem has been pointed out meaningful change will happen. Something with as much weight and history as a 50 year old game isn’t going to change quickly. It needs to, but it will stagger under it’s own weight. It’s tempting to take a shot at gamers and say they’ll stagger under their own weight as well – but perpetuating another stereotype doesn’t help. Some of the people involved will not recognize their own privilege and rage at anyone trying to change what they perceive as their own domain. Geek culture has raced to popularity lately, but that doesn’t change the thought processes of people that have felt marginalized or socially disparaged for a significant part of their lives. It’s going to be a long struggle, but one we all need to start NOW.
The first step to correcting anything is admitting to and understanding that there is a problem. Fantasy gaming, D&D in particular, has a problem and I have unwittingly been part of that problem. Now that I am aware I will be more thoughtful of how I represent things, people, situations and characters across the games I play and the stories I write.
I would love to play in or run a super diverse game. I have always taken purposeful strides toward inclusivity and gender balance in all the games I run. I want to do better. I will do better. Knowing more will help. Being aware will help. What sort of things have you encountered (good or bad) in your game experiences? What suggestions do you have for creating a more diverse and accepting game environment?
As Predicted
One of the dangers of science fiction is using dates. When you put a date on something that’s in the “distant future” there’s a very real chance (at least if you’re story is good enough to endure) that you’ll eventually reach that date. Then you will pass that date, and things may or may not have turned out quite the way you expected. 1984 is a glaring example of this, but there are a lot of other examples – particularly in film. Two examples of this have popped up and gotten my attention lately.
The first is Johnny Mnemonic. Back in 1995 the year 2021 felt like it was far away. At this point we were supposed to be using physical implants to improve our lives (faster reflexes, stronger muscles) along with those things connected directly to our brains so we could interface with the deep, inner workings of the cyberworld directly. Well, we’re here in 2021. I’m not faster, nor am I stronger. I am also not seeing chain mail shirts as a fashion statement for body guards. Io9 has a fun look at this in greater depth here. I am glad we don’t have an 80 gig limit in our noggins given that I work with terabytes of information regularly. I’m going to reserve judgment on the rest.
The second is less obvious. Reign of Fire from back in 2002. Yes, a ‘future set’ movie about dragons taking over the world and burning the place down. I went back to watch this one again since it had been a while. The opening info dump actually placed the ‘current year’ as 2020. While the world hasn’t burned to the ground, 2020 didn’t exactly register as a stellar year for anyone that I know. This is definitely an underrated movie. It’s got Christian Bale, Gerard Butler and Matthew McConaughey. Yes, all of them in the same movie. The story isn’t deep, but the movie has got lots of action, a Star Wars reenactment play AND a dragon attacking a castle. Well worth digging a copy up and giving it a view.
So, we’re not wearing chain mail. We’re not hiding from dragons. Are we better off? Debatable I think.
What “future set” movie prediction is your favorite?
Rare Constancy
Over the past few years I have written about health related things a couple of times. I haven’t written a great deal about the current conditions we live with – here in the middle of a global pandemic. A friend wrote a piece the other day admonishing folks to have a certain level or preparedness when it comes to things going pear shaped on the medical front. I’m going to repost all of the story I’d done previously further down, but I am need to emphasize a few things first.
One of the most important things you can do is be aware of your own health. Don’t lie to yourself about it. That’s not going to help anyone. Once you are honest about things with yourself, try to figure out if there are any things you should be doing to help yourself to maintain. Sure getting better is an important goal, but sometimes stable is where you need to start. Staying healthy is a long term struggle.
Sometimes in that struggle, things go wrong. Stuff happens. It happens to all of us – some of us more than others. (One of the lines from Animal Farm that has stuck with me all these years, “some animals are more equal than others…”). When it comes to being the support person for medical related problems I have gained a fair amount of experience. As I typed in the notes to my friend, this is not my first rodeo. I have been “support guy” for 3 hospitalizations a year (on average) for the past 15 years. Medical problems/emergencies/surgeries can be scary things, even to those who are familiar with the processes involved. There is a list of things you should consider in order to be prepared. I’m going to cover a few here.
It’s a good idea to have what the military guys call a “go bag”. It’s a backpack or some kind of gym bag or something that has emergency stuff in it. Get some casual / loose fitting clothes and put them in a plastic bag in there. Also in there:
Insurance Information
List of Medications and Medical Conditions
Toothbrush, hygiene products.
A novel, puzzle book, electronic game to pass time
Extra phone charger, AC adapter
Personal Emergency Contacts
Set up a Text Group to notify key individuals at once.
Appoint a main point of contact among your emergency contacts to avoid confusion.
Make sure everyone has a role – who takes care of the pets (and how)? Who gets the mail (where does it go)? Who needs to call others? Who has access to your vehicle and home? Who will secure and watch your home in your absence?
Vital on this list – get your will, your living will / medical directives AND a durable power of attorney done. No, it won’t be free. YES, it matters a lot. Do it as soon as you are able. This is not the territory of the ancient and infirm. You need these documents and you need to put them on record at your doctor’s office. Keep a copy in whatever secure location you have at home. Make sure people on your list know about them and can get to them. This is NOT a secret!
Make copies of your (general/big item) medical history and your list of meds. Shrink these copies down to a small but readable size. Get self laminating sheets from the dollar store and make them durable. Jamb those things in your daily carry item (wallet/purse/fanny pack). Have an extra (durable or not?) copy that you can simply hand to the EMT/Paramedic/nurse/police officer and not worry about losing. Keep this information up to date!
Don’t Panic. You help nobody if you can’t help yourself remain calm. Freak out later, take care of your people first. IF it’s possible, get a second person to listen to what everyone says. Don’t be afraid to take notes. YOU must be your own advocate!
Track all the things. Discharge paperwork, dates of service, home instructions/restrictions. Yes, it’s like homework but it matters. Keep all this in a safe and accessible place. The insurance company doesn’t know what happened and will probably have lots of questions later.
Ask friends for help, and give help to your friends when they need it. It’s a very hard lesson to learn when people you thought were “tight” with you bail at the first sign of trouble. Take care of yourself and those you care for.
This is an edited version of what I wrote before, chronicling our early roller coaster ride of heart and health related issues. There has been a LOT more since this was written:
—-
I wrote this for our fanzine as part of our first meeting at The Midtown Scholar. I felt it was important to give a little sample of how the community of fans of science fiction and fantasy can really come together and make a difference, but I don’t want to limit the number of people that see it. I have had many wonderful experiences with this fan group and genuinely hope to have many, many more. Rare Constancy was originally written as part of an advocacy fanzine to help raise awareness of heart problems among fans. I’ve kept the advocacy bits in here, but I also hope the connections I’ve made to some wonderful and amazing people show through as well.
I’ve not experienced heart problems myself. I hope I never have to. I hope you never have to either. I’ve got some small experience dealing with hospitals, ICUs, cardiologist visits and all that mess. You can keep it if it’s all the same to you. Nothing against the people doing those jobs, I’m just not a fan of hanging out there more than I really have to.
Rare
Just over 5 years ago (at the time of this writing) my wife and I were expecting our first child. It wasn’t a simple process with the doctors because there was a certain amount of risk involved. Rebecca, my wife, had been diagnosed with a heart condition when she was very young. She had been taking medication for this “condition” which was diagnosed as various things, including Cardiomyopathy, all her life. The doctors monitored and checked and made copious notes, but in the end we were ready to go. We were thrilled, excited and running about trying to “be prepared” just like any other first time parents. We thought we had it all nailed down. As the saying goes, just when you thought you had all the answers somebody changed the questions.
A couple of weeks after our beautiful daughter was born wonderfully healthy and without complications, my wife started having trouble breathing. She had a cold and was as tired and wrung out as any first time parent. We did our best to cope with everything. Despite our best efforts my wife’s health got worse. Worse to the point where we needed to get back to the doctor. As it happened, this was fortuitous timing. She described it as drowning. Very, very slowly drowning. My wife had pneumonia. That’s bad in and of itself, but it didn’t respond to medication well because as it turns out pneumonia wasn’t all she had going on. That was where things really started to go downhill.
In terms that I can understand, congestive heart failure means the heart weakens leading to things like fluids building up through out the body and that does things like puts pressure on the lungs making it hard for them to expand properly. The fluid also adds pressure to the heart (already less than perfect in my wife’s case) and makes it’s beating less able to pump things out, therefore allowing more fluid to build. Lather, rinse, repeat until dead. My daughter was born mid November and before Christmas my wife was in the hospital with congestive heart failure. I was home with our newborn and lots of long days and nights.
I’ll be honest. Those days are a blur to me now. I don’t remember what I did other than sleep mostly dressed with one hand on the baby basket rocking it in my sleep. I could mix formula without conscious thought and have a diaper changing time that would shame most pit crews. Christmas in the hospital isn’t a great thing. The staff there do their best to keep spirits up, but tinsel on a gurney doesn’t look festive to me, it just looks sadly out of place.
After a couple of weeks attempting to get things cleared up and get medicines straightened out my wife was released from the hospital. The doctors gave directions to have very limited fluid intake and a low sodium diet in order to avoid a reoccurrence of the fluid buildup (and therefore more heart failure).
Constancy.
You are educated people! If something is vague or unclear, ask questions consistently! How much is “limited fluid”? Turned out they wanted to limit my wife to a liter of fluid per day. One liter – any and all liquids – that’s it. How low is “low sodium”? How about less than 1500mg per day. For perspective, a typical candy bar has about 150mg of sodium in it. Yeah, 10% of your daily allowable total for a snack. Try that sometime – see how it works out. The key is to ask every time you don’t understand something. Get specifics. This isn’t easy to do in emergency situations, but once the immediate crisis is past there really isn’t any excuse. Read everything they give you. Consistently follow their recommendations. The only person you’re lying to if you don’t is yourself. The ones that truly suffer are those around you. If you’re in the support position, as I was, this is the key to getting by.
Rare.
Be one of those rare folks that takes the time to ask the questions. It’s your (or your partner’s) health, be interested! You don’t need to be like my wife and ask if you are allowed to watch procedures while they’re happening, but you should get the scoop on them. Usually once the doctor knows you’re interested they’re more than happy to expound endlessly about the minutiae they were forced to memorize that nobody cares all that much about on a day to day basis.
The end you say? Hardly.
Sometimes despite your best effort things don’t go the way they should. After ten months of following this strict plan, counting everything, residing within the limits given, and taking all the medicine as ordered Rebecca started having trouble again. Yes, for those of you scoring at home that brings us around to another holiday filled with heart problems.
Here is something from the glory of e-mail archives, a message to friends in my wife’s own words:
“About 3 weeks ago I started to have a tight heavy feeling in my chest. When it kept coming back after a few days I called the cardiologist. They are a little cautious about these sorts of things considering the situation, so in I went for tests, tests, and a few more tests. The nuclear stress test they did led them to believe I had a blockage which led to a recent heart catheterization. During the cath they realized that I did not have a blockage, but that my arteries don’t all go where they’re supposed to. In other words I was born with an abnormally formed heart. (I blame Dad’s Polish heritage…probably had the freakin’ blueprints upside down or something when they made me. What the hell? I blamed his German heritage for my liver processing the Coumadin so fast that they couldn’t get my levels high enough and I was stuck in the hospital for weeks over Christmas. Good thing Daddy’s got broad shoulders, huh?!) Don’t ask how someone can be seen for a heart condition for as long as I have and they just now realize what exactly the problem is. Apparently, the whole thing is pretty rare…”
Rare.
There are times when it’s not such a great thing to be the rare one – and despite television’s take on all things medicinal – heart trouble is one of those times. The rare condition my wife had is actually called ALCAPA (Anomalous Left Coronary Artery originating from the Pulmonary Artery). Rare in the United States means it affects 1 in 300,000 live births. ALCAPA represents approximately 0.25-0.5% of congenital (born with) heart defects. When it does happen (these days at least) they either find it in infancy because the baby shows signs of heart failure and they fix it or it kills the baby. In the odd instance where the child survives and reaches adulthood with a misdiagnosis or without being diagnosed at all, the defect is most commonly found post-mortem. Usually the person just drops dead with no signs of anything having been wrong – because the heart is only working in the neighborhood of thirty percent of its actual capacity.
Thankfully we have a fantastic cardiologist. Once he figured out what was wrong and how rare it was to have an actual, still breathing case of this he told us the straight version of things. He said there was a pretty good chance this was a once in a practice kind of thing for him. He may never see another case like my wife if he practices from now until retirement. I say he’s fantastic because rather than try to fix it himself he wanted to direct us to his mentor (who had seen three or four of these cases). Rare indeed.
To make a very long story a little shorter, we ended up consulting with the mentor (a fine thoracic surgeon). He, in association with his partner, had written a peer reviewed paper on the condition and had done some studies on surgically repairing the condition. I say if you need a repairman, get the guy that wrote the directions when you can.
So at age 33 my wife joined the zipper club and had open heart surgery to repair the defective arteries and place a new valve in her heart. It was a very successful procedure with fewer complications than expected. The only glitch in the entire process was with the camera they had set up to record the procedure for teaching purposes. If something in the process is going to fail – let it be the camera that’s recording the whole thing. The procedure was smooth and the hospital stay relatively short. Recovery time from open heart surgery is not so short.
Constancy.
I am amazed and blessed with the friends my wife and I have through fandom. They are chosen family for me, and they are always there. I had a friend from this crowd volunteer to sleep on the couch one night each weekend during those recovery months so that I could get some rest (my wife wasn’t allowed to pick up our infant daughter for six months after the surgery for fear of tearing something). When my schedule became too tight and I couldn’t manage everything I had a friend from the group burn one of her vacation days to help out. I know how few of those everyone gets, and to have a fellow fan surrender one in the name of helping out is something I am grateful for to this day. Be constant for your friends and fellow fans, it means more than you know. When times get really tough your true friends remain.
Cooked meals, companionship and helping hands all from connections I made through fandom. Fellow fans are my chosen family and have been for a very long time. The sense of community is amazing for such a diverse and scattered crowd. Once connected all those years ago I found a rare and constant bunch. They all showed me how amazing (and crazy) they could be when the chips were down. I’m hoping to continue to expand the circle of fans I know because I can’t imagine who might need my help out there, but if I can pay even a little of these things back it will be worth it.